Room at the Gym

Sipping my coffee, the screaming began

I stepped to the left and past me they ran

Dozens of partly dressed women and men

Towels round their waists I stared at them, then

The creatures appeared in a mob round the bend

Voices from boxes said “we are your friend”

In three fingered hands each a shiny device

From the boxes again “do not run we be nice”

But the yelling folks knew as they uttered a scream

When immobilized by the device’s blue beam

That these were not friends nor was nice in their plan

And one by one dropped an unfit woman or man

I hid in an alley but had no success

A creature appeared and my mind was a mess

And the beam hit me full and scanned my poor self

The creature retreated, a shy alien elf

Another swung round the first alien said:

“ignore the one in there, no fat, poorly bred”

Then a ship overhead hovered up all the meat

Paralysis vanished, I rose to my feet

Wandered out to the street in a tizzy

Thankful that tonight the gym wouldn’t be busy

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